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  • Writer's pictureLauren Morris

Good enough? Sometimes it just has to be.

We all do it. Some more than others. We all ask ourselves am I good enough? Is what I'm doing good enough? Is good enough actually good enough?

It can be an endless cycle and it can create a lot of chaos in your mind.

When you find yourself caught in the cyclone of thoughts it can be difficult to get it to stop. I know for me there are several ways I find myself in this mess. As a parent, I'm in a constant state of "are we doing enough?".

What has helped quite a lot when it comes to parenting and the ongoing array of "we're going to fuck this up" thoughts is that no matter what we do, at some point the kids are going to blame us so we might as well just have fun with the process of parenting.

That philosophy has taken us far especially in some very tough situations. It's also something I'm able to then map onto other aspects of my life. Nothing is ever perfect and while striving to always do my best is the goal that doesn't equal the outcome being "perfect". If perfection is unattainable then while I'm trying my best, I might as well also have fun doing whatever it is I'm working on.

That's the thing, if I'm not having fun or doing something that has meaning then why am I committing to the work? Why say yes to a role in a play I don't really like? Why perform with a group of people who don't make what I'm doing fun? Why over commit just so people will like me when I myself am not getting anything out of it?

These are the questions I ask myself when different opportunities arise. If the opportunity is going to bring me joy, align with my goals or values then yes let's do it. If not, let's pass and let me focus on something where I can be good enough. I might as well have fun since perfection isn't attainable.

When I do get stuck in the "not good enough" loop it's this internal conversation I have with myself to help break the cycle. I also have other things I do to break that loop. A dance party with the kids helps me get out of my head and into my body. Plus it's a moment to really have fun with the most important people in my life. I write in a journal, meditate, or reach out to a friend and see how they are doing. If I focus on someone else than I can't ruminate about being "good enough".

I encourage you to put your best foot forward but let go of always needing to be perfect. Instead, let yourself know that you are good enough and that's how it's going to be!

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